Well, I made up the second part.

I enjoy a read over by Tawny Grammar (formerly One Pot Meal) once in a while, and this piece reminded me why.

I thought I’d packed a kiwifruit in my lunch, but I guess it was really a wikifruit because just as I was about to slice and eat it a stranger rushed over and told me it was a peach. And before I could say anything, a second stranger ran up and said no, not a peach, it was a rare variant of hairy nectarine, secretly developed by the CIA in the 1950s.

(There’s more.)